Believe me I know that crippling feeling of knowing, that the only one that can make life feel any happier about who we are, is ourselves.

That moment when we know we are going to have to grab life by the balls and create the difference we want to feel.

*Ouch*

But how, when social media, google, magazines and those around us are all harping on about self improvement?

What we need is to change our body language and we can do this in three simple ways.

Words fill up our environment every day.

What we read, what we hear, what we think.

How we communicate and relate with others and our self.

Words have power.

If we are absorbing words that are keeping us “frozen” in a space that we just cannot move from, then no amount of action is going to create the changes we want long term.

Here are 3 ways to Love your body by changing your body language.

❤️ Step 1.

You do not need improving!

When we want to improve something, and obsessively read, research, and the worst … compare!  We create a lack of acceptance to what IS, which forms resistance.

Resistance is a challenging energy to work with, and we match it with force, push, try and shove.

We do not try to love a child, a pet … a lover, we simply love.

And we know that if we force a child or lover to do something, they will dig their heels in and resist.

So step one is to create for yourself a loving environment, exactly as you would for a plant, animal or child.

Think nest … nurturing and supportive.   Full of encouraging messages.

Remove your self improvement books and the glossy magazines with unobtainable airbrushed bodies (because they are not real)

Grab some pens and paper, glitter too if you fancy and create love notes to yourself.  (This is a personal love of mine, any excuse for glitter)

Stick them above your kettle, on your fridge, on your mirror … surround yourself with feel good, words.

We absorb the power of words and images all the time without really noticing … that’s why advertising works.

You do not have to believe them right now.  They are new supportive words in your environment to absorb.

What words are filling up your environment that you can throw away today?

❤️ Step 2

Notice how you speak to yourself.

I bet you would not dream of speaking to a friend, relative, child, animal, the way you speak to yourself.

The inner body bully is our worst enemy but we can change that.  Simply by noticing and choosing softer, kinder, empowering internal communication.

For over a year my son has not been himself at all.  He recently shared with me, that every morning, he had begun writing a list.  A list of all the things he was grateful for about himself.

He was choosing to change his inner dialogue … his thoughts and feelings with gratitude for who he is from the inside out.

I know it was a struggle to begin with but the change in him as he showed up for himself in a loving way each morning has changed the way he is relating to himself and the world around him.

Bullies go away, when we do not react to them and our inner body bully is no different.

❤️ Step 3.

The most important place to feel safe in the whole world is in your body.

Feeling safe comes from trust.  And so we need to be able to trust ourselves with our self.

How can we do this?  By listening.

Your body has a language, it is an intelligence all of it’s own, that breathes while you sleep and keeps your organs working.

Language works both ways as does trust.

If we take time to listen to our body, it will tell us what it need.

As we listen, and take the actions to meet our unique body needs, it begins to soften in trust and change shape and move and relate with us in amazing new ways.

Just place a hand on your heart and ask.

“What do you need?”

“How may I love you?”

Allow words, a knowing, an image  to arise … remember no force, no TRY.

Just allowing your body space to speak.

These are daily ways of choosing to relate with your body. 

My own body and those I have worked alongside, have physically changed as the internal world of language has changed.

Why?

Because love and beauty are not external … they shine from the inside out.

I would love to hear your experiences of creating a loving language with your body.