I’d like to introduce you to Claire who, together with her partner, have decided to start their tantric journey and have come to me to help guide them.
I’ve decided to start them off on individual sessions to help them reconnect with their bodies and explore their own sensuality and sexuality, before taking them on their couple tantric journey together and Claire has decided to blog about it, no holds barred.
Here is the start of her journey, which she is kindly also sharing with you here, on my blog…
My Tantric Journey Revs Up
I’ve been on a personal transformation quest ever since I discovered the concept of healing energies after a business meeting turned into an unexpected Reiki treatment back in.. ooh 2000 I think it was. From that point I’ve explored many things and Tantra has been on and off my radar for a fair few years but now, my tantric journey has decided it’s truly time to rev up a notch.
And well, I thought I’d share it with you. You love a bit of oversharing don’t you..
How it all started
I can’t honestly remember my first taste of Tantra, though it was probably via an erotic novel I was reading in secret to while away the lonely hours. And that infamous story about Sting doing ‘it’ for hours on end of course.
It only really came to my attention as something that maybe I could explore when my friend Michelle got started on her tantric journey in about 2009. She shared books she was reading and we talked over Bloody Mary’s or cups of tea about relationships we’d had and what we really wanted – with sex, love, work, life in general.
She decided she wanted to explore more into tantra as a therapy and found a lovely guy called Mark who lived in Hove at the time who kindly offered to expand her skills on a one to one basis. I was a body for one of her lessons – I can hand on heart say she knows every part of me haha!
That was my first experience of Tantric massage and one that I found surprisingly easy to do. The worst bit was being the only one naked in the room but that quickly wore off as they matter of factly discussed and tried different touch and tension and relaxation techniques – some of which felt like a normal massage and some that were a lot more sensual. It was weird as my mind was not turned on at all but I found that my body responded. No, there was no “happy ending” – honest. (Though I wouldn’t have complained or been embarrassed by that point.. ahem).
After that, we did chat about me maybe travelling the same path as her but my self confidence wasn’t great and my personal life somewhat haphazard, so I decided that no, I’d wait to explore Tantra when I was with someone who was open to the idea.
I did however continue to read about sex and relationships on a regular basis and wish I was brave enough to fling my knickers to the wind and go on a workshop somewhere.. I never did.
A Tantric Relationship – seriously?!
However, after three barren, singledom years, I’ve accidentally found myself in a relationship. I don’t know how he slipped under my defences, maybe it was because I didn’t even realise he was dating me. I just thought he wanted to be my friend. Yes. Stamp TWIT (not twat), on my forehead please.
So yep, late August, early September this year – I’m not quite sure when exactly – I rediscovered the art of snogging for endless hours and feeling like a horny teenager again. YAY!
Even better than that, he was open to the idea of Tantra.
Now, I’m not known for being much of an immediate action taker but my new bloke appears to be. Well, he is where this is concerned anyway. And yes, that IS surprising to me.
I’ve had previous partners say that they’re willing to explore Tantra but they’ve never. done. a. thing.
What IS Tantra?
You see, Tantra is not just about lengthy orgasmic sex (though that will hopefully become a by-product of what I learn). It’s about integrating every part of you – the physical, emotional, spiritual. Loving yourself. Releasing emotional and mental blocks and ultimately dealing with your shit. Making you whole.
This is achieved by harnessing and using your sexual energy to circulate throughout your body through breath and meditation. This in turn spills over into every part of your life. It’s a creative force and helps attract into your life what you need for your highest good and in turn, those around you.
In fact, you can practise Tantra whilst single – both the philosophy and sexual aspects. I was just too lazy to ever get round to it.
So how has my Tantric journey started to rev up?
I’ve been reading. A lot. Most recently it was Tantra, Sex, Orgasm & Meditation by Sean Orford who tantalisingly teases that he has a whole series written on this subject but only this first one seems to have been published – gawd dammit!
I also dug out a massage book called Tantric Massage – The Erotic Touch Of Love (aff link) that I’d bought a long time ago but never had the opportunity to ponder over its pages.. until now. NOW I had a willing victim to practise my ministrations on.. I will do a book review on that soon.
I next had a chat with Michelle and then we both talked to her together. He had a fair few questions – he’s completely new to the whole thing – and we’ve decided to ask Michelle to help us get started. So, prepare yourself for my next update ;)